Anonymous asked: Dear Todd, I’m in love with my neighbor’s wife. What should I do?
Todd says: Always consult the Bible. It’s full of advice on scoring with the ladies.
In your case, the 10th Commandment is most germane. It states: “Thou shalt not covet thy neighbors ox,” which some might say applies to wives, too. But remember, we’re talking about the Tenth Commandment, which makes it the least important one.
So, I suggest that you check your HOA covenants regarding livestock. If your neighborhood doesn’t permit livestock, then it probably doesn’t permit your neighbor’s ox which, Biblically speaking, means it doesn’t permit his wife, either.
So, you’re obviously well within your rights to go to your neighbor’s house and remove said ox, at which point she becomes your property.